#80: Compassion and Empathy with Trans Artist and Musician Romeo Reyes

Romeo Reyes is a transgender singer, actor, songwriter, tattoo artist, painter and model. He and Lisa talk about the differences he has personally encountered and experienced since his transition five years ago, and the ways we can have an honest and respectful conversation around the topic. He also talks about his passions as an artist, advice for parents that may have a transgender child, and what we can gain by truly listening to the experience of others with empathy and curiosity.

Here are a few places listeners unfamiliar with the trans experience can learn more:

Gender Proud on Facebook

Human Rights Campaign – Understanding the Trans Experience

Here is a video Romeo made doing a totally gorgeous a capella duet with his former self. WOW!

Four Years! Beautiful!

Highlights:

At a very young age, Romeo identified as a male, yet found that his peers weren’t mature enough to handle his identity.
There are cultures where transgender people are viewed as more in tune with the spiritual world.
Romeo transitioned 5 years ago and recalls a large number of unwanted advances while attending everything from a night out to an audition for a female role.
After his transitioned, Romeo realized several things about now presenting as a male instead of female. First, there were times he did miss being a female, and he was listened to more without being second-guessed. Also, without the monthly hormone cycle, it felt at times boring and as though something was missing.
Not only are you transitioning into something you, but you are also mourning a loss. For Romeo, one thing was the loss of his female singing voice.
The transitional surgery can be a different experience depending on waitlist, cost, and availability due to location.
Gender can be fluid, and it is about experiencing what is right in the moment with no judgment about the possibility of de-transitioning. Romeo still relates to both genders and has friendships with those that identify as nonbinary.
There is much to be learned when we put aside our own preconceptions and truly listen to what others are saying.

Quotes:

“One of my dreams in life was to be a boy, and to be a perfect boyfriend.”
“I always knew who I was, I just knew everyone else around me wouldn’t have taken it so well.”
“Now I don’t even have to try, I just talk and people listen. It’s so weird.”
“This is what it feels like to be a male – super chill. But at times I found it boring!”
“To be a woman, you have to be strong mentally and emotionally just because of all the pressure.”
“I miss the camaraderie of a women’s restroom, it’s just the little things.”
“I think my purpose in life is to help people in some way.”